8 life lessons that I have personally learned over the past 7 days, for the week ending 11/28/09:
1: HOLDING IN YOUR FEELINGS COULD BE KILLING YOU . . . LITERALLY – A new Swedish study (found here) shows that men who bottle up their anger at being unfairly treated at work are up to five times more likely to suffer a heart attack, or even die from one, than those who let their frustration show. The study by the Stress Research Institute of Stockholm University followed 2,755 employed men who had not suffered any heart attacks from 1992 to 2003. At the end of the study, 47 participants had either suffered an attack, or died from heart disease, and many of those had been found to be “covertly coping” with unfair treatment at work. Covert coping was listed as “letting thing pass without saying anything” and “going away” despite feelings of being done wrong by colleagues or bosses.
2: ALWAYS TRY TO LEARN NEW THINGS – Without turning life lessons into a closing scene with Kyle and Stan from South Park, you should always try to learn new things. There should be plenty of thing coming at you throughout your day to learn from, but if there is not, or there is not a learning experience that’s giving you enough of a challenge, seek out something new to learn. You’ve probably been in need of a new hobby anyway.
3: WRITE DOWN WHAT YOU ARE LEARNING NEW, AND WHAT YOU HAVE ALREADY HAVE LEARNED – You don’t always know what you know. That’s why you file things away. Don’t believe me? Can you at this very moment recite verbatim every skill you possess from every job that you have held? That why you write a resume, and revise it often to keep it relevant to want you need to know now, not what you needed to know way back when. Keeping a log of what you are learning and what you have previously learned could save your sanity if you are a workaholic data freak like I happen to be.
4. TAKE STOCK IN MEMORIES – Remember to cherish your memories. Especially the ones that are trigger out of the blue. Be grateful for memories in the making, and do not be so afraid of cameras. Those cameras are capturing images that will help you reform those memories years down the road. Helping my parents with a project of converting old VHS home movies to DVD took me back 20 years to being a teenager that wasn’t all that fond of spending time in front of my parents while they narrated my life on camera, and allowed me to see footage of me and my younger sister in happy situations I had long forgotten. And with my sister having past almost 6 years ago, my parents have a way to reintroduce my niece and nephew to their mother, as they were to young to remember much about her.
5: YOUR SUPPORTERS WILL TURN ON YOU IF YOU GIVE THEM THE RIGHT INCENTIVE – The story of Tiger Woods crashing his SUV is growing by leaps and bounds. Now mixed in with stories of infidelity and spouses “going ghetto” and lashing out, it has becomes a gossip column’s dream, especially for a guy who is notorious for not letting anyone in on what is going on in his life. And a small back lash is growing as Tiger refuses to talk about the incident . . . even to authorities. A few weeks ago, he threw a club into a gallery and hit some guy, gave a pretty lame apology, and the press that had done its best to work around Tiger and his ‘famous bad temper’ was beginning to question the price of giving him a pass for admission into his tent . . . where he gave as little information as he chose to. Those who gave him the most leeway are now looking at him with the most contempt.
6: YOUR SUPPORTERS DON’T HAVE TO TURN ON YOU IF YOU CAN HELP IT – Taking it from televangelist and Kobe Bryant, you can regain your public support just as quickly as you ruined it if you play your cards right. Come out with the truth early and play all the sympathy cards you can get your hands on. And let the people forgive you. Then keep on winning so they forget you ever had your little digression.
7. SAVE ROOM FOR DESSERT – A few days ago in the United States we celebrated Thanksgiving, a holiday that is supposed to be a remembrance of the Pilgrims surviving there first year in the New World, but is pretty much all about eating turkey for two weeks and getting ready for Christmas shopping. But even with all the fixin’s in front of you, always remember to leave room for some dessert. You won’t regret it.
8: TAKE TIME TO GIVE THANKS EVERYDAY – We put a lot of emphasis starting with Thanksgiving on the act of actually giving thanks for what we have. In the last year, we’ve seen a lot of losses and people, and I’ve been through a lot of personal losses. But I always find a way to give thanks for what I do have . . . family, friends, opportunities . . . even as I face more troubling times on the way. The only way to get better is to give thanks for what you already have. You can’t gain more until you learn to appreciate what you’ve already got.
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